Twenty-Eighteen

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Happy New Year!

Anyone else feel terrified or is it just me? If you're like me and tune into all the new stuff people are posting, proclaiming, and demanding of themselves for the new year that has set in then you may understand some of this terror I'm encountering. I feel like I am pressured to change- but what if I don't want to ? New year same me, egh- cliche. 

For those of you who are feeling pressured to have to change something or force any kind of extreme drastic routine upon yourselves like losing 50 pounds, saving money, etc.- D O N ' T. No one ever said it was mandatory to switch up on yourself but the option and choice is entirely yours for sure.

For me, I find it more challenging in making "grown up" changes. I know its like "shut up Rachel, you're a mom already + boring"- but I don't feel that way. I still want to carelessly spend my coins on gorgeous fits, spontaneous nights, traveling, and all the other fun stuff people in their 20's do. But I'm going to be 25 this year for crying out loud. I'm terrified of planning for real life events, like saving to put a down-payment on a house, choosing between school and a good opportunity happening right now, minimizing debt, Landon's growing expenses and so on and so on and believe me we can do this "so on" forever. When do we as young adults begin the transparent transition into adulthood or do we ever? It almost seems impossible to say no to a brand new pair of shoes or a dazzling bag simply because I am saving for whatever it is adults save for. 

So here's my compromise with you 2018: longevity. I will allow myself to make short term commitments with the idea and expectation of applying it to a long term goal, a grown up goal if you may. I'll be taking baby steps towards the bigger picture to say the very least. Sacrificing small temporary splurges, pleasures, and "highs" will make the journey to adulthood a lot smoother and better to manage. By self-inflicting discipline I feel it will allow me to polish myself into the best possible version of me I hope and can possibly be. 

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Rachel Lorena2 Comments